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Over the years of getting to know the graduates of our life coach training program, I’ve found that everyone has a special gift (or several). One that’s especially beautiful to witness is the gift of seeing the light in people.
When we see someone’s light, we help bring it forth. We encourage them to remember who they are beyond their problems. It’s an incredible service. Do you have this skill?
We’re wired to focus on flaws. It goes all the way back to our most animalistic survival mechanisms. Problems can alert us to danger. A pain in our foot might be telling us that it’s inside an alligator’s mouth. A crack in a wall might mean that it’s about to come crashing down on us. So we fixate on the negative.
In today’s minds, the thoughts and observations that emerge from this survival mechanism look more like . . . I should be in better shape. I’m not productive enough. I’m missing out. There’s something wrong with me. I’m probably going to get cancer. People don’t like me. My skin looks bad. I don’t have enough money. I’m never going to do anything impressive with my life.
These judgments are almost always useless and inaccurate. And because we’re usually only semi-conscious of them, they tend to go unchallenged. The result of spending more energy thinking about what’s wrong than what’s right is an epidemic obstruction of the light within us. We forget that who/what we really are is perfect, peaceful, and powerful.
Resurrecting our light has two facets: (1) clearing away whatever obstructs it; and (2) inviting the light to shine within and beyond us, making ourselves beacons in the world.
When you make a practice of seeing the light in others, your own will naturally emerge. As you go through your day, try to see the light in each person you encounter. Even someone who tells you everything’s going wrong if their life. Even the cop that’s writing you a speeding ticket. Even the politician you dislike.
What happens when you speak directly to someone’s light? What changes about your interaction? What happens when you communicate from your light to theirs?
Part of why we feel this is such an essential aspect of life coach training is that you may be the only one in a given individual’s life who’s actively looking for their light. You may be the only one who notices that it’s been obscured but believes it’s still in there. The person themselves may barely realize what’s happened or understand why life feels heavy. Their friends and family may be in the same boat, or they may be so accustomed to seeing them this way that they simply reflect back an attitude that seems to confirm that “this is just how you are.”
It’s a gift to both you and the other party to focus on their virtuous core and call it forth with an inner attitude of, “Regardless of what you tell me of your challenges and limitations, and regardless of your history, I see what’s inside you. I know what you have the potential to be.”
If reading this feels thrilling, like your heart is saying, “Yes! I want to do this for my fellow humans!” then I encourage you to join the Dragontree Life Coach training program. Even if you aren’t in a position to change careers, it’s a learning and growing experience that will deeply enrich your life and forever change how to relate to others.
Be well,
Peter
[post_title] => Can You See People’s Light?
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As we approach the American Thanksgiving holiday, for the first time ever we have to use the term “American Thanksgiving.” We always have so much to be thankful for, but this year it’s a little different because we’ve made big strides in expanding how we perform our mission in the world.
For most of our existence, The Dragontree has been followed by the words “Holistic Day Spa.” But, beginning a few years ago, we became more than a spa when we launched our natural and therapeutic product line. In the past year, we started an online course in nutrition, we launched our whole-health magazine called WELL, and we published our Dreambook – resources to more effectively help you become your most vibrant, centered, and peaceful self. Our redesigned website just went live, which will make it easier for you to explore all the wonderful things we offer.
While we continue to devote ourselves to ensuring exceptional healing experiences for the patrons of our spas, our new offerings enable us to help clients in more diverse ways and to reach an audience far beyond our beloved cities of Portland and Boulder. We have emerging relationships with people in dozens of countries around the world, and we are delighted and honored to be able to make a difference in your lives.
We have the deepest gratitude for being able to dedicate ourselves to this work, and to be able to witness the healing and accomplishments of those who have crossed our paths.
Thank you.
Briana and Dr. Peter Borten
[post_title] => Your Most Vibrant, Centered, and Grateful Self
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Seven years ago, Briana and I started working on a book for people who are ready to transform their lives. It’s called Rituals for Transformation. It features 108 lessons to be done over 108 days, and it takes the reader on a journey of healing and awakening. Of all our courses and books, it’s the thing I’m most proud of. I can go through the book myself, year after year, and get something new out of it each time.
Today I’d like to share lesson number 83: Every hardship is an opportunity to let go. The following is excerpted from the book.
What parts of life are hard for you? Take a look at your hardship today, and ask yourself these questions. First, what’s wrong with hard? We understand that you may prefer easy, but is it possible to see hard as just hard, and not wrong? Like a workout should be. Like a day of farm work. Hard, but manageable.
Second, what is my role in the perception of this situation as hard? While there are certain circumstances that nearly anyone would perceive as objectively hard – like carrying boulders – others are only subjectively hard because of your personal viewpoint. Hardship is a state of mind that can be difficult to relinquish. Perhaps you were taught that hard work is noble, or that it’s the only way to achieve anything, or that easy equals lazy. Such notions could lead you to believe you get extra credit for leading a hard life.
Third, could I let go of my feelings about this situation? Hold a hard situation in mind and feel what comes up in your body. Feel willingly. Invite the feeling. Welcome it. Breathe into it. And let it go.
Fourth, what’s possible when I let go? What’s beneath that hardship? When you view your hardship as an opportunity to let go, a tremendous array of additional opportunities arise. Thus, every hardship becomes an opportunity…
… to wake up
… to forgive
… to practice changing perspective
… to find new ways to play
… to put what you’ve been learning to the test
… to practice flexibility
… to reunite with a fragmented part of yourself
… to level up
… to reaffirm your values
… to practice going with the flow
… to discover your needs
… to use your gifts
… to connect to Spirit
… to grow
… to own your power
… to access intuition
… to live your purpose
… to ask for help
… to open your heart
… to relinquish control
… to be supported
… to choose lightness
… to experience trust
… to love yourself
… and to become who you really are.
Holding this hardship in mind, scan that list, and see if one of these many opportunities jumps out at you. Make a choice to change your story. Now, what’s one thing you can do right now to move yourself in the direction of this choice?
Be well,
Peter
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Over the years of getting to know the graduates of our life coach training program, I’ve found that everyone has a special gift (or several). One that’s especially beautiful to witness is the gift of seeing the light in people.
When we see someone’s light, we help bring it forth. We encourage them to remember who they are beyond their problems. It’s an incredible service. Do you have this skill?
We’re wired to focus on flaws. It goes all the way back to our most animalistic survival mechanisms. Problems can alert us to danger. A pain in our foot might be telling us that it’s inside an alligator’s mouth. A crack in a wall might mean that it’s about to come crashing down on us. So we fixate on the negative.
In today’s minds, the thoughts and observations that emerge from this survival mechanism look more like . . . I should be in better shape. I’m not productive enough. I’m missing out. There’s something wrong with me. I’m probably going to get cancer. People don’t like me. My skin looks bad. I don’t have enough money. I’m never going to do anything impressive with my life.
These judgments are almost always useless and inaccurate. And because we’re usually only semi-conscious of them, they tend to go unchallenged. The result of spending more energy thinking about what’s wrong than what’s right is an epidemic obstruction of the light within us. We forget that who/what we really are is perfect, peaceful, and powerful.
Resurrecting our light has two facets: (1) clearing away whatever obstructs it; and (2) inviting the light to shine within and beyond us, making ourselves beacons in the world.
When you make a practice of seeing the light in others, your own will naturally emerge. As you go through your day, try to see the light in each person you encounter. Even someone who tells you everything’s going wrong if their life. Even the cop that’s writing you a speeding ticket. Even the politician you dislike.
What happens when you speak directly to someone’s light? What changes about your interaction? What happens when you communicate from your light to theirs?
Part of why we feel this is such an essential aspect of life coach training is that you may be the only one in a given individual’s life who’s actively looking for their light. You may be the only one who notices that it’s been obscured but believes it’s still in there. The person themselves may barely realize what’s happened or understand why life feels heavy. Their friends and family may be in the same boat, or they may be so accustomed to seeing them this way that they simply reflect back an attitude that seems to confirm that “this is just how you are.”
It’s a gift to both you and the other party to focus on their virtuous core and call it forth with an inner attitude of, “Regardless of what you tell me of your challenges and limitations, and regardless of your history, I see what’s inside you. I know what you have the potential to be.”
If reading this feels thrilling, like your heart is saying, “Yes! I want to do this for my fellow humans!” then I encourage you to join the Dragontree Life Coach training program. Even if you aren’t in a position to change careers, it’s a learning and growing experience that will deeply enrich your life and forever change how to relate to others.
Be well,
Peter
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